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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

I love you BUT ....

Once you moved out, I "de-teenage girled" my house. (yes that is a word if you're a mom of teens)

You've been out over 2 years now. That means my house is in order. I have everything where I want it and for the most part, it's usually clean.

I have converted your bedroom to my "Barbie Room".

I made your bathroom a "spa" type room. That ahhhh, tub soaking room with all the very pale green and ivory colors ... as in towels and throw rugs.

My kitchen has clean, uncluttered counters.

My laundry is always caught up.

My kitchen garbage never has a chance to overflow.

I never walk into the bathroom to find the TP roll empty or in the kitchen, the paper towel roll spent. No wet wash cloths left in my shower.

The toothpaste tube never looks like it got in a gang fight and forgot it's gang.

My blow dryer is always stowed under the bathroom sink and the flat iron fits nicely in the drawer.

You and your boyfriend had "words" Monday and you decided you needed a brain break.

5 'o'clock AM you showed up at my house. I'm your mom, I understand and you are always welcome here.

BUT ...

Can you PLEASE NOT TRASH MY HOUSE?

In the two days/nights you've been here, I can tell what you've worn, what you've eaten, what color make up (YES it's ON my IVORY rugs in the bathroom) you've used.

I see black mascara on my white pillow case. Blobs of toothpaste in the sink. Wads of Kleenex wherever you were sitting as you poured out your drama to your girlfriends on the phone.

My brushes are loaded with your hair. And where is my wide tooth comb I use on my wet hair?

My black heels are in your pile of cloths on the floor. Oh yes, that's another thing. Sure, do laundry here, but jeez Louise, you used all my hangers, filled the spare closet, and now have your clothes semi-folded in piles on the Barbie Room floor. Or are they piles of dirty ones ... or both?

I love you dearly, but if you don't make up with your boyfriend or get a place with a girlfriend, I will be on the 11 o'clock news for drop kicking your azz through the goal posts of life!

You think I'm kidding? Here's just a glimpse:


I know these are blurred,
you get the picture though.

15 comments:

Linda and her Twaddle said...

How cute. ha ha ha. So funny.

And all that pink.

Patience said...

Put your foot down, Mom!!!

sherry lee said...

Jeez Louise...this is Thelma here...those photos look like my house with my 17 year old and 21 year old BOYS!!! One home until end of August from Uni, one here until he's 50 probably!! lol!!!

I get this so well..now let's hope daughter dear hears you too!! :)

The Laughing Idiot said...

Go Mom!

I probably would have drop kicked her already. She's being pretty disrespectul.

Are you sure she's planning on moving back out? Looks like she's tired of being an adult and has settled in for the long haul. I say, "Sorry kiddo, you can't turn back the clock. You're no longer a child, now act like it!"

Just my opinion.

Gnightgirl said...

Good luck. Brian & Co. can "transform" my house in 10 minutes, to a state in which it takes me a week to get back in order after he leaves.

Maybe now that he's married...

sgk213 said...

I can relate. I have one exactly like her at my house. Only she says she is never leaving. :(

Karin said...

Oh, boy.....You have my sympathies for the mess, and Caitlin has my sympathies for the heartache.

Candy said...

Is there any chance my daughter is living at your house too? Good God that's familiar.

Michael said...

Definitely time for her to get her own place. I know the perfect condo...and it's cheap!

Margie said...

I have her male version in my home...the mess can be cleaned up, the heart can mend...the most important thing is that she is safe.

San said...

Tiff and grandkids have been gone for a week and I'm still working on the big clean up! But I will still look forward to their next visit.
Margie's comment is so true.

Twisted Cinderella said...

I fight this battle every day and unfortunately my girl is nowhere near ready to move out (they don't allow that at age 7 LOL) and Prince Charming is too old to change his ways now. It is tough being a neat freak in a house of slobs!

Ree said...

snort. This is why you NEVER let them back in. ;-)

Joan said...

Now our houses look alike.

Sugarplum's Mom said...

Ah... boomerang babies... so far I haven't been one but I have a couple cousins that always seem to be in and out of their parents houses too.