Rubbing Elbows

Did you ever hang out with anyone famous? Musicians, actors, writers, politicians?

In the 80's my ex-husband was in a band. For the most part, they played locally. There was a hotel bar they were always booked at. The regional manager of this hotel, lived in the area and was always there. He loved the band, so they had an open contract to play there when ever they wanted. I think they played Tues-Sat for six months straight. Always to a packed room, usually having to turn people away at the door. Yes, they were that good.

This hotel was where famous people stayed when they came to the Detroit metro area. Since Bill and I didn't have our kids back then, I was there most every night too. I met many famous people, but the best nights were when we actually partied with them. I found a couple photos to post, but DO NOT MENTION MY HAIR. Good Lawdy, what was I thinking?

Anyway, who have you partied with? Any funny stories?

Colin Hay from Men at Work

Dan Baird from The Georgia Satellites

Mr. T, got a problem with that?

Citizens with Mr T.

My kids dad is 2nd from left.

Citizens with Colin Hay

There were others, Stevie Nicks, Tom Petty, Kenny Loggins, Steven Perry, Debbie Harry (Blondie) to name a few.

Oh yeah, my funny story? This guy was so drunk one night he stumbled into the stained glass wall divider and his "rug" slid off. I kinda smirked, he grabbed it and put it back on as he staggered away.

Countess of Constipation

Dooce built her empire (sorta) on the topic of constipation.

When my niece, FanneeDoolee, started blogging, she said she wasn't going to write about poop. I laughed and said since she has two small children, she certainly will have some poopy posts.

My nephew Michael started blogging and since he has no children, imagine my surprise when I read a few of his posts about poop!

I never thought I would blog about any bodily functions. If dog poop doesn't count, I have stuck to my original thought ... until now.

For the ones that know me, I mean really.know.me. know that I could be nicknamed Countess of Constipation.

I am talking days, more than a week of days, like after about 10 days is when I begin to think something better give.

Since I have been on my diet, I have been in my Countess mode. Unfortunately I have not been on the throne for about 10 days.

*Here's where the light bulb goes on in my brain.

From past experience, nothing, I mean NOTHING works. Saturday I called my sister and asked her what that "stuff" was she took the night before her colonoscopy.

I went to Walgreen's and got a bottle of magnesium citrate, lemon/lime flavor. I am so used to being constipated, I forgot to take it that night.

I read the directions Sunday and it said it could start working 30 minutes to 6 hours after drinking. Well, there's a small window ... NOT. I decided I better wait until Sunday night, when I am in the house for the night. Right before bed I had my magnesium nightcap and chased it with 2 bottles of water and went to bed. When I woke up, I was disappointed, nothing, I didn't have any inclination to hold court in my bathroom.

Oh.My.Goodness. I wasn't up 15 minutes and this deep sense of urgency came over me. I was thrilled, it worked perfectly and early enough in the day that I could enjoy the sunshine. I haven't felt as, ahem, empty as I did right then until ...

Less than five minutes later. The pump had been primed. I sat there thinking my whole insides were being sucked out of me with a vacuum. After the initial shock, once again, I was pleased and justified it by thinking that what? ... We have 30 feet of intestines in there? OK, so that all made sense. But I was glad it was over... or so I thought.

Dare I go on? Well I did ... and on, and on and all frickin day long. Can I just say it worked?!

Right from the bottle it says:

"Do not use magnesium citrate as a laxative; if your constipation is a continuing problem, contact your health care provider".

I guess they know what they are talking about.

Poop Bloggin

Being a new "blogger" I have been surfing around the net enjoying reading other peoples blogs. It seems there are many Mommy and Daddy bloggers and everyone has a few "poop" stories to share. As much as I chuckle about them, I've been happily void of those situations. My son is 21, doesn't live with me and my daughter is 18 ... poop days are long gone for me.... until last night.

The little boy next door, Kyle, is about 8 and the cutest kid on the block. He adores our dog Quinn (side note, his legal name is Quinnie the Pooh) and wants to play with him every chance he can. Quinn has a "doggie door" so he comes in and out as he pleases. Kyle has always been welcomed into the backyard, and hops the fence whenever Quinn is out there.

I heard Quinn go out, and I saw Kyle and his friend hop the fence, I assumed to play with Quinn. I never really looked out again, but I heard lots of laughter. Through the door wall I could see the boys running around the yard, Quinn chasing them and and occasional "thud" sound. I figured they were having a snowball fight.

When winter comes, I never go out and scoop dog poop. Come spring, I am guaranteed a bumper crop of it. It dawned on me I had better remind the boys to beware of Quinn's poop. Quinn is only 10 pounds, so he drops tootsie roll size turds.

I stuck my head out the door and saw Kyle standing there in just his socks, no gloves ... boots off, snow pants off, coat off, laughing hysterically. He had the lid to my garbage can, holding it as a shield. I asked him why he was half undressed and he said he got "some" poop on him. Just then, with precision, he raised his shield as his friend launched a poopball at him! It hit the garbage can lid, like a frozen fudgesicle. Needless to say, I had to halt their fun and advise them to go home and get in hot showers.

So poop it is, no matter if you have little kids in the home or not ... where there is poop, kids are involved!