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Showing posts with label Missives. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Missives. Show all posts

Friday, April 18, 2008

Moanin' Missives

Dear guy behind me at the light,

I know we can turn "right on red". I hear you blowing your horn as you wave your arms in the air, pointing at the clear traffic and motioning me to turn right. Did it ever occur to you I am going straight? Just because you are turning right, doesn't mean I am.

Please don't give me your dirty look when I just smile and wave back. It takes a lot for me not to just hop out and get all up in your face.

Buckle up,
Nancy


Dear co-worker that I have written so much about,

You are a grown man. Why do you talk baby talk on the phone ... to suppliers? Why did you just call and say in a sing-song whiny voice "Hi Mikie, can you get *this part* delivered out here today, pwetty pweese. You can? Thanks hon-neee."

It makes me want to slap you upside your head McFly!

Professionally speaking,
Nancy


Dear lady in front of me at the check out,

You have over $100 in groceries, 80% of them being crap, junk-food, and frozen dinners. Why do you have to argue with the cashier over a .25 frickin cent coupon? Don't you see the 5 of us lined up behind you? When I handed you a dollar and said "here, this more than covers your coupon," why did you give me a dirty look? It broke the frustration in line and clearly showed you how stupid you looked and sounded.

If you need to pinch pennies, rethink those Hostess Ding-Dongs and multi-pack cans of Pringles. Your butt and your wallet could do without them.

Organically yours,
Nancy