Saturday: Phone dies, no service, go to Ver*zon, they say it's a bad phone, plays with it for a few minutes, gets service. They don't have mine in stock so they will order new replacement, but Monday is a holiday, so it will go through Tuesday, ship Wednesday, receive Thursday ... at my work address.Saturday night: No service
Sunday: Go back to Ver*zon, it is working again.
Sunday night: No service :::Light Bulb Brain::: ... I drive to Ver*zon parking lot, yes, service is on.They have a frickin tower in their building.
Monday: Labor Day, no service ... I thought they were closed (found out later they weren't)
Tuesday: 9:00 AM Waiting at door for them to open.
Tuesday: 9:01 AM I explain, through gritted teeth, two weeks ago I disconnected my home phone, I must have a phone. They put in an order to ship overnight, guaranteeing delivery by Wednesday 10:30 AM.
Wednesday: 12:30 PM, no phone, call Ver*zon, verify it was shipped, get FedEx tracking number.
Wednesday: 12:31 PM, call FedEx, verify they tried to deliver item, no one was home. HOME?????

Wednesday: 12:32 PM, called Ver*zon, oops, they didn't request overnight phone to go to work address.
Verified that the Thursday phone (first one ordered Tuesday) would go to work address by 10:30 AM.
Thursday: 11:00 AM, no Phone
Thursday: 11:01 AM, (biting tongue) Call Ver*zon, get tracking number.
Thursday: 11:02 AM, call FedEx, verify attempt was once again made to HOME ADDRESS.
Thursday: 11:03 AM, poor FedEx lady, heard foreign noises coming through my gritted teeth while biting tongue. Thankfully, she called the driver, explained I was less than a mile away from the home address, and he brought it to me.
I have never had a problem with Ver*zon before, no horror stories, no bill problems, no bad phones ... so I think all of the above is one cluster f*ck of six years of my loyalty to them, served to me at once.
Came home tonight, hot water heater completely broken ... you would not believe what happened next.
I'll continue tomorrow ... oh yeah, it beats out Ver*zon!