Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Bill : Hi, busy?
Me: Not really.
Bill: What are you doing?
Me: Watching porn.
Bill: ::: silence :::
Me: Wait, that didn't sound right.
Me: I'm watching porn, but it's not mine, its Bryan's. (our son)
Bill : ::: silence:::
Me: Still doesn't sound right does it?
I went on to explain, while cleaning, I found Bryan's porn stash. I had a rule when my kids lived with me, no drugs, booze, porn, or paraphernalia of any kind anywhere in my house. I explained it was their home, but my house. My house has rules and I will enforce them, NOTHING is sacred. I guaranteed them I will go through their drawers, closets, backpacks, purses, hiding spots they think I don't know about AND that it is my right and duty. And I did.
When I first found Bryan's porn tapes, I figured OK, probably most boys his age have them. Don't freak. It's against my rules though, so I'll pitch them and tell him after the garbage has been picked up.
Then, I wondered. What does he watch? Is it soft porn? Is it the dumb porn recorded off the Playboy channel? Or ... is it the degrading of women porn? I'd hate to think my kid was watching porn where a woman was being treated sub-human. No way would I want him to think that was acceptable. I also wanted to make sure he wasn't into MILFy porn ...yikes!
So I sat there and watched. I suppose I could have just fast forwarded through the tapes, but actually, they weren't bad. Most were just soft porn. Some were, as I thought, amateur clips recorded off the Playboy channel.
I did throw the tapes out and I did tell him. Porn is porn and it wasn't allowed.
This happened when my son was 14 years old. When I met my girlfriend Donna last Saturday, we were swapping stories of how we handled our teens as they were growing up. We were thanking the Lord they were all grown, but still biting our nails wondering what their young adulthood has in store for us.